Dinner with the Malfoy family
by Miss Bellatrix
Summary: Such is my humour. Enjoy, review. :) Complete ficlet


Author: Miss Bellatrix

Date: 28/09/03

A/N: Please review! I always love getting reviews!

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Half the guests had arrived before Narcissa even bothered to check if Draco was awake, let alone ready for dinner. She stepped into his bedroom, and followed the watery noises to the closed door of his bathroom. 

"Are you ready for dinner, Draco?"

A muffled response sounding suspiciously like "Not until I have to wear mittens in Hell, mother..." was the only reply, so she rapped hard on the door and scowled.

"You have 5 minutes to be out of that bathroom, Draco, and I want you dressed and looking respectable, otherwise I'll send a house-elf to DRAG you out." She paused. No answer.

"Well? Get. OUT!"

"You're standing there against the door! I can hear you! To get me out you have to move. Get. Away. From. The. Door."

"Don't get smart with me."

"I'm not coming out 'til you leave. You're my mother."

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Honestly, you're as bad as those goddamn house-elves. Perverts, all of you."

Narcissa gave up and walked out of the bedroom.

~*~

10 minutes later, Draco appeared at the doorway of the dining room. Wearing plain black robes and not bothering to slick back his hair, he scowled at his father, sat down opposite his cousins and unfortunately, beside his Aunt Elladora. A sideways glance showed that she obviously disliked him as much as ever, but was eyeing him up anyway. He took a glass of wine and proceeded to down it as quickly as possible- earning him a warning glare from Lucius.

"Narcissa, when are you marrying him off?"

Draco snorted half the wine back up his nose, and received a kick under the table from his father. Narcissa managed a slight smile and answered with "Draco has a girlfriend, already, so it's not suitable at this point in tie in pairing him up."

Elladora pondered this for a few seconds, and then looked back at him.

"What about Destiny?"

Draco looked over at Destiny, his first cousin on his fathers' side, and threw a worried glance at his mother. 

"She's kidding, right?"

"Not at all, boy. Marry her, she's of good blood."

"The same blood as mine, I might add. Having three-quarters of the same gene pool as your wife isn't usually a good thing, not to mention the fact that we used to feed each other insects. My girlfriend at Hogwarts is of good blood, as well."

Narcissa smiled and cut in.

"She is, indeed. Ebony Saunders, fantastic family. They used to go to all the Ministry meetings with us, and Angelus was a Death Eater with Lucius and myself for quite a few years. He's in Azkaban now, of course."

Aunt Elladora was still not impressed.

"You're only a teenager. Narcissa, why do you let him date? You should keep him home alone until you find a suitable girl."

Draco scowled. 

"Ebony is just FINE, thank you very much."

"A little over-protective of her, aren't we? Exactly how close ARE you to her?"

Draco's cheeks tinged pink at the very idea of his Aunt knowing what he got up to with his girlfriend.

"Oh, aren't we quite the little Lolita..."

"Lolita is a GIRL, Aunt Elladora. And a *muggle*, I might add."

"Well, if we get you out of those boring robes, you'd pass for a girl. Smooth skin, glossy hair and high cheekbones."

At this, Draco gave up.

"Right! If I hear Aunt Elladora or my mother speak about my sex life ONE more time, I'm going upstairs to my room and I'm NOT coming down until tomorrow morning."

~*~

Main course passed fairly uneventful, with Draco speaking only with the two other people his age- Kellan Lestrange, his first cousin on his mothers' side, and Destiny Malfoy, his first cousin on Lucius' side. Eventually, though, their conversations petered out until they began listening in on their parents. Bellatrix honed in on Draco.

"So, how is school going?"

"Fine."

"What are you doing there? I hear from your father that there is next-to-nothing in the way of Dark Arts at that retched school."

"Oh, the usual atrocities. Tormenting mudbloods, kicking kittens..."

Destiny snickered at this, and Draco looked up, his eyes amused.

"Don't laugh, just because your parents don't have any qualms about shipping you off to Durmstrang."

"Yes, Durmstrang is much better. Hogwarts is just...I couldn't handle it."

"Oh, yes, the anguish...I look very affected, don't I?"

"You do, as a matter of fact. Rather peaky."

"That would be the fact that I've had to spend 2 straight hours with extended family." He let a stereotypical Malfoy smirk loose and raised his champagne glass to hers, letting the fine crystal meet gently.

Bellatrix seemed to notice him again.

"So Draco, are you looking forward to when you'll be Lord of Malfoy Manor?"

Draco tried to entertain the idea in his mind, but couldn't without laughing.

"Oh yeah, I can hardly wait. I've always wanted to behead house-elves." At this comment, Elladora shot him a sharp look and Kellan and himself shared a careful smirk. Elladora noticed.

"You know, boy, I remember when you used to play with dolls, so don't get too smart."

Draco flushed.

"They were puppets!"

Kellan snickered slightly, to avoid detection. Draco let a well-aimed kick from his Italian shoes sink into Kellan's lower shin, only raising his eyebrows in feigned innocence when Kellan complained. His grandmother, Elizabeth Malfoy, looked up at him sternly for her in-depth conversation about genetics with her son.

"Child!"

"I am not a child! I have the power to make you leave the house and God help me, I'll do it if it means I will be able to eat my dinner in peace!"

"You were born with a silver spoon in your mouth, dear."

"Are you saying I'm spoon-fed?"

Elizabeth looked at him harshly.

"Petulance isn't a virtue, Draco. Stop behaving like a toddler."

Draco sighed and looked over at Destiny. 

"I suppose, it's all we can ask for. Malfoy's aren't usually sentimental."

"Mmm. Much rather sententious, and more often as well."

Draco and Destiny exchanged an entertained glance and laughed. Destiny reached for the middle of the table and picked up an apple, throwing it at Draco. He deftly caught it and returned it to its place on the table-runner. 

"There's a reason why I'm a seeker in my house Quidditch team, Des."

"Because your father paid for the brooms?"

Draco pondered this amidst her laughter. "Yes, pretty much. And, I can catch."

Meanwhile, Narcissa had got out the family tree and was poring over it carefully.

"Draco? Is Ebony's mother's name Helena?"

Draco suddenly felt a pit of dread form in his stomach. "Yes, why?"

"She's related to the family, through marriage. About 6 generations ago."

Aunt Elladora cut in. "Well, it's about time the families were united again! When's the date?"

Draco scowled at her again, the frown marring his otherwise attractive face. 

"Dammit, there will be. NO. WEDDING! What happens if Ebony and I want to just screw around like rabbits until we're 40, then die of exhaustion?"

Narcissa shot him a sharp look and showed him the page.

"She's your...Oh, I don't know. But her mother is related to one of the women who married into the Malfoy a long time ago."

"Dammit. Thought it was too good to be true."

"Draco, you're related to a lot of people. It's part of being pureblood."

"When you say pureblood, I keep thinking 'inbred'. Is that going through your head too, or is it just me?"

Narcissa swatted his hand carefully with a heavy, solid silver fork. He ignored it.

"I've always got to be careful. I didn't need to check with Hermione, to see if we were related or not."

Lucius suddenly snapped out of his conversation with his mother and stared at him.

"You slept with Hermione GRANGER?"

"Yes."

"The MUDBLOOD?!"

"Yes. And let me tell you, I doubt I would have ever contemplated it if you had of actually taught me something to do with sex!"

"Your tutor taught you everything you needed to know, Draco."

"Oh yeah? It was one sentence- if you stick it in a mudblood, it'll fall off. Great." Kellan laughed at this, but was quickly subdued by Destiny. Draco reached for his half-full glass of wine and tipped it down his throat in one suave, smooth gesture. He stood up, pushed his chair up against the table, and replaced the wine glass carefully on the table.

"I've had enough. I'm going to bed."

He stalked off down the corridor. Aunt Elladora clearly muttered "Teenagers" and shook her head.

When he reached his bedroom he kicked off his shoes, shrugged off his robes, and unbuttoned the black shirt he had on. Casting a silencing charm on his part of the house, he went to bed, thankful that dinner was over for another year.

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End file.
